Ahhhh....

Ok...I'll admit it...I'm an HPT JUNKIE!!! I can't help it...I stock up and test almost daily near the end of my 2ww! I'm also an OPK junkie...2 days after I finish the clomid...I test twice daily until I get my LH surge or AF shows! I can't help it...and if I don't pee on something for a few days it drives me crazy...like something from my daily routine is missing!

I had my blood work done today at lunch to confirm if I ovulated. I went home to grab a bite to eat and on my way out the door I decided to go back up stairs, pee on a stick, just to see if something would appear. I was late back to lunch so I brought the test with me in the car. I kept glancing at it on the drive back to work and it looked like a definite negative. In the parking lot at work I closely inspected the stick...and I swear there was a faint line...but I'm also pretty sure I was imagining a 'faint-line'...I mean very faint! I'm only 8dpo so the chances of anything showing are slim to NONE...and I'm going to have to accept that my eyes and brain are playing cruel tricks on me...not fair!

I just pulled the test out of my purse and checked it again...impossible to tell now...the dye in the test has bled funny and smudged the test and control line...like I already said - I'll just have to accept that I am now imagining fake positives.

Back to my blood work...man...the girl who draws my blood...is the most incompetent lab tech alive! She is soooo bad at it! She usually jabs the needle in...misses...jabs again...puts the collection tube on and realizes she has still missed...and then just moves the needle around in my arm until she hits some thing that produces more of a trickle rather than a flow of blood! I keep going back because there is no wait and the clinic is just down the street from our house. When I go to the (what I call) "good lab" - there is never any problem drawing my blood but I usually have to wait at least an hour. Bah...I always look like a 'real' junkie when I'm done having my blood taken...with numerous stab wounds and bruising!

OK...I guess I'll have to do an HPT in the morning now...it will drive me nuts if I don't. I wasn't planning on starting to test till Thursday...but I caved today and have started my obsessive testing cycle early!